View Full Version : No Taliban Monkey Machinegunners!

July 28, 2010, 07:34
Well, this is certainly a relief.. from:

Taliban can't train monkeys to shoot US soldiers with machine-guns, say scientists

Two weeks ago, the Chinese People's Daily Online reported - citing a "British press agency" - that the Taliban was training monkeys to shoot at US troops.

Armed with "Kalashnikovs, Bren machine-guns and trench mortars", the macaques and baboons are being taught to recognise and fire upon anyone wearing a US military uniform.

“A senior US military source confirmed the existence of the Taliban monkey soldiers, military experts call armed monkeys ‘monkey terrorists’,” it said.

Read more: http://www.news.com.au/technology/taliban-cant-train-monkeys-to-shoot-us-soldiers-with-machine-guns-say-scientists/story-e6frfro0-1225897407988#ixzz0uynNs5Du

July 28, 2010, 07:37
You can't make this stuff up, if this was in a science fiction novel it would be laughed at as "too ludicrous".

July 28, 2010, 07:40
Maybe the Chinese know what really happened to Elvis too.

July 28, 2010, 08:50
Hmmm, might have some applications in Africa as well. Let's start a group "Donate an SKS - save the Gorillas". :biggrin:

July 28, 2010, 08:58
Sounds like they have been watching to many reruns of the planet of the apes movies.

July 28, 2010, 09:21
The enemy is deploying the secret weapon...

The Trunk Monkey


July 28, 2010, 09:30

Having been in Afghanistan, Taliban folks LIVE planet of the Apes. Plus most dont have TV to watch that SH1T.


July 28, 2010, 10:10
We need to start training suicide bomber pigs.

July 28, 2010, 10:27
Those arent monkeys, they just finally let their women take off their burkahs.

Tuscan Raider
July 28, 2010, 12:27
Why not? We've trained dogs to sniff out stuff, and dolphins
to attach limpet mines to ships. Thought I saw something
about penguins,maybe?

Wonder if we tried it first?

July 28, 2010, 12:52
Dr. Evil agrees! Sharks with frickin' laser beams attached to their heads...

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July 28, 2010, 13:09
Originally posted by jrkoller
Sounds like they have been watching to many reruns of the planet of the apes movies.

You'd think they'd issue M-1 carbines, then.

July 28, 2010, 13:14
Originally posted by Brett
We need to start training suicide bomber pigs.

Sorry, this is the best we can do.


July 28, 2010, 13:39
why not ..."they" had one in the presidential office for the last 8 years ...cheetah had a higher IQ...i just hope they dont get a hold of any knuckleer warheaids ;)

July 28, 2010, 17:35
Watch where you step, ggiilliiee is back.

July 30, 2010, 19:11
I guess the Gillie person has been out of the loop too long to realise that the REAL chimp is in the Offal Orifice as we speak. Course it's terribly politically incorrect of me to call obongo a "chimp" much less a porch ape. But it was waaay OK to compare Dubya to an ape.

July 30, 2010, 20:16
You are expecting too much from ggiilliiee if you expect him to be PC. Or even have anything intelligent to say. But he's good for a Dem vote or two.