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bouncer50
March 15, 2009, 05:58
My wife used to bitch about me reading a newpaper or a magazine in the bathroom. She used to say how can you sit their and crap and read.? Most guys i know read in the bathroom. I do some of my best reading in the bathroom.:biggrin: I guess it a guy thing.:confused:

shlomo
March 15, 2009, 06:28
Women in general do not understand men because women, in general, are not rational creatures. There are exceptions, but they are very rare.

The smart ones just accept the fact that we work differently, and are good to go with it.

Regal Beagal
March 15, 2009, 07:12
I would have to agree with Shlomo, women aren't rational thinkers they are more emotional creatures who base alot of their decisions on their emotions, instead of their brain. Look at all of the women/soccer moms running around town in their SUVs with Obama stickers on the back..... Oh, and looks and outwardly appearence are more important to a woman than what is going on on in a man's mind and heart....Once again, just look at the SMs.....

homelandprotector
March 15, 2009, 07:22
Women suck. :wink:

TheJokker
March 15, 2009, 08:27
we are animals with rigid instinctual behavior patterns.

shlomo
March 15, 2009, 08:41
Originally posted by TheJokker
we are animals with rigid instinctual behavior patterns.

Not all of us. Some folks have minds guiding their actions.



(Crap. Now I've lit the fuse.)

dscottch
March 15, 2009, 08:54
My wife says ya'll need a time out! Then you can reflect on why you didn't mind the complaining at the beginning of the relationship. :whiskey:

Scott

shlomo
March 15, 2009, 08:58
Originally posted by dscottch
My wife says ya'll need a time out! Then you can reflect on why you didn't mind the complaining at the beginning of the relationship. :whiskey:

Scott

I don't need any time for this one.

The answer is that the complaining wasn't there at the beginning of the relationship. If it had, it would have been the end of the relationship, and women all know it.

NoNotAgain
March 15, 2009, 09:49
Originally posted by homelandprotector
Women suck. :wink:

Only the good ones, the rest of them just blow.

brownknees
March 15, 2009, 15:19
Thank heaven women don't understand us.
If they did we'd be so screwed.:rofl:

Jaxxas
March 15, 2009, 15:45
While I certainly agree that women don't understand men, I think they do better than I ever did on those few occasions when I foolishly tried to understand women!

shlomo
March 15, 2009, 16:12
Originally posted by brownknees
Thank heaven women don't understand us.
If they did we'd be so screwed.:rofl:

That may be truer than you know.

Or maybe you do.:devil:

phillip
March 15, 2009, 18:05
yeah! my wife is the same way. take this morning for example, i was sittin there on my throne, minding my own business, eating breakfast, and she comes banging on the door bitchin cuz i had the salt shaker.:rolleyes:

MAINER
March 15, 2009, 18:18
Lemme explain it guys:

"ALL bathrooms are belong to HER'S " :rolleyes:

Ya know that, right?

Stranger
March 15, 2009, 20:32
Originally posted by bouncer50
My wife used to bitch about me reading a newpaper or a magazine in the bathroom. She used to say how can you sit their and crap and read.? Most guys i know read in the bathroom. I do some of my best reading in the bathroom.:biggrin: I guess it a guy thing.:confused:

It not a guy thing, it a you thing. Not everyone (most everyone in my opinion) has your issue.

If I feel the need to take a shit I can have the product out of me in two seconds. I can hold it for five minutes or five hours but it still takes the same amount of time to it to exit.

I have never understood people who see the need to take reading material for their time on the pot. You are there for one purpose. Take a shit. Be done with it an go on with your very short life. No one is going to say the end of their lives, "Gee, I wish I would have spent more time on the toilet."

If I have to take a crap it is over and done with in five minutes max (total time in and out of the door, WITH hand washing). There isn't a person in my family (extended even) who takes more than 10 minutes to take a crap.

It is so unusual, that I was flabbergasted by my college roommate who would plan on using 45 minutes in order to take a dump. He was one who would take a book in with him. :confused:

I am certainly not implying you are one among these, but most of the guys I have known to take a long time in the bathroom reading were "relieving" themselves of more than just a turd.

They used it to make some bean curd for the porcelain god.

biggun
March 15, 2009, 20:52
Just remember they are all crazy and it makes them easier to understand.

torquemada055
March 15, 2009, 21:11
Women=

Cant
Understand
Normal
Thinking


What more do you need to know?

TheJokker
March 16, 2009, 07:10
Originally posted by shlomo


Not all of us. Some folks have minds guiding their actions.



(Crap. Now I've lit the fuse.)

sure... you "decided" to spend your weekend nights chasing skirts and listening to women "talk". you "decided" to spend your money and time decorating the living room with your girl. people "decide" all the time to follow compulsively their lizard brains...

AndyC
March 16, 2009, 07:49
Originally posted by phillip
...i was sittin there on my throne, minding my own business, eating breakfast...
Don't eat where you crap, is my motto.

lawdog
March 16, 2009, 08:38
Stranger - Why take so long in the potty? Simple. It's the only place that I can go in the entire house that I don't have an entourage following me around. I love my kids. I love my wife. But damn, I'd never get a moment's peace if it weren't for my bathroom being the Fortress of Solitude.

I confess to actually having pretended to need to use the bathroom, just so I could get a couple quiet minutes. It's the only room that they don't want to be in with me at the same time. And that's a good thing....

Stranger
March 16, 2009, 09:49
Originally posted by lawdog
Stranger - Why take so long in the potty? Simple. It's the only place that I can go in the entire house that I don't have an entourage following me around. I love my kids. I love my wife. But damn, I'd never get a moment's peace if it weren't for my bathroom being the Fortress of Solitude.

I confess to actually having pretended to need to use the bathroom, just so I could get a couple quiet minutes. It's the only room that they don't want to be in with me at the same time. And that's a good thing....

That is an excellent reason to sit in the bathroom for hours.

Windustsearch
March 16, 2009, 09:52
Originally posted by MAINER
Lemme explain it guys:

"ALL bathrooms are belong to HER'S " :rolleyes:

Ya know that, right?

That's why I am always having to pee in the kitchen sink.

Brett
March 16, 2009, 10:10
Before you buy a wedding ring, make sure the house you are going to live in has two bathrooms.

Jaxxas
March 16, 2009, 14:15
Originally posted by lawdog
Stranger - Why take so long in the potty? Simple. It's the only place that I can go in the entire house that I don't have an entourage following me around. I love my kids. I love my wife. But damn, I'd never get a moment's peace if it weren't for my bathroom being the Fortress of Solitude.

I confess to actually having pretended to need to use the bathroom, just so I could get a couple quiet minutes. It's the only room that they don't want to be in with me at the same time. And that's a good thing....


Lucky you! The bathroom bought me no relief from my "adoring fans"! And then they would stand there looking in the mirror or what ever bitching about how bad I stank! On the few occasions I could manage a loud gaseous retort, they'd be like "That's so gross"! Or my favorite... "you meant to do that"! And they would just stay there smelling that sh!t, and trust me I got some bad sh!t! Not your run of the mill bad sh!t, but Samuel L Jackson bad muthaf*&^ing bad sh!t!

No the bathroom for me was like my EX's "Fortress of I've got you cornered now"!

Back to the topic, I will never understand women!

phillip
March 16, 2009, 16:22
Originally posted by AndyC

Don't eat where you crap, is my motto.

No no, i was crappin where i eat.:biggrin:

odenhome1
March 16, 2009, 19:35
i like to read on the thrown too. (Dean Koontz's books are awesome)
so um try to find a box that you can put them in so you can pull them out from under the sink or something. So there not in her way.

Best yet you can download the audio for the book. Then place it in an MP3 player and listen to it, also since it is portable it wouldn't have to be left in the bathroom. :biggrin:

odenhome1:bigangel:

PS for Complainers : I believe this is better grammar than my other posts too

lutefisk
March 16, 2009, 19:54
windy, why are you peeing in the sink when the perimeter of your dwelling needs marking and maintenance?

My wife is okay(finally) with the peeing outside. She does, however, require me to move it around and not kill so much grass.

AndyC
March 16, 2009, 20:01
Originally posted by phillip
No no, i was crappin where i eat.:biggrin:
Get tapeworm much? Seriously, dude, that could be dangerous to your health.

Barbcue
March 16, 2009, 20:06
Originally posted by Stranger


It not a guy thing, it a you thing. Not everyone (most everyone in my opinion) has your issue.

If I feel the need to take a shit I can have the product out of me in two seconds. I can hold it for five minutes or five hours but it still takes the same amount of time to it to exit.

I have never understood people who see the need to take reading material for their time on the pot. You are there for one purpose. Take a shit. Be done with it an go on with your very short life. No one is going to say the end of their lives, "Gee, I wish I would have spent more time on the toilet."

If I have to take a crap it is over and done with in five minutes max (total time in and out of the door, WITH hand washing). There isn't a person in my family (extended even) who takes more than 10 minutes to take a crap.

It is so unusual, that I was flabbergasted by my college roommate who would plan on using 45 minutes in order to take a dump. He was one who would take a book in with him. :confused:

I am certainly not implying you are one among these, but most of the guys I have known to take a long time in the bathroom reading were "relieving" themselves of more than just a turd.

They used it to make some bean curd for the porcelain god.

not everyones system works that fast.. some folks take awhile to do the deed.

lutefisk
March 16, 2009, 20:14
Let me try again. WOMEN ARE EVIL, the proof:
(pls give me a break as I can't make square or square root symbols)

1. Women=Time and Money
2. Time = Money
THUS, W= T x M/(T/M)=(M)2

3. Since, money is the root of evil... M=the square root of E
and W=(M)2

or W=(square root of E)2


THUS W= E ( or women = evil)

There is the proof you've been looking for.

I will provided math tutorials for FALFILE contributions.

moonbat60
March 16, 2009, 22:34
The whole deal is going like this...............

When getting married, the woman does expect the man to change, and he does not.

When getting married, the man does not expect the woman to change, and she does.

( I read that somewhere............)

I also hate it being disturbed when I sit on the can. Those are my 5 or 10 minutes of peace and serenity. Even at work I made it pretty clear that when I sit on the can..................I SIT ON THE CAN. Period.

The only reason(s ) for allowing others to disturb my peace are : the outbreak of WW3, rioting in the neighborhood or someone trying to break into the house.

;fal:

Pete

kfranz
March 17, 2009, 09:24
Originally posted by Barbcue


not everyones system works that fast.. some folks take awhile to do the deed.

More drinking might help. Water that is. Drinking more water. Point beer would work too, but it's hard to come by some places. Anyway, while there's variation in system function, proper hydration improves efficiancy. My oldest son is as looooooong pooper. When he's properly hydrated though, he doesn't take nearly so long.

torquemada055
March 17, 2009, 10:42
Since, money is the root of evil...

If you are going to use a quote, please include the entire line!

1 Timothy 6:10


For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.



Just wanted to make sure everyone knows it's not that money in and of itself is evil, it's just that those who lust after it become ensnared by said lust and thus go down................

not everyones system works that fast.. some folks take awhile to do the deed.

For those of you who dont seem to understand, you may want to try some of the following,http://www.drnatura.com/

V guy
March 17, 2009, 10:47
I walked into the girlfriends living room a while back and tried to talk to her but she said she was watching the movie. I shut my mouth, sat there and watched the movie. After ten minutes she got up and shut the tv off and yelled at me "that I was not paying any attention to her".

HughJass
March 17, 2009, 11:28
Originally posted by kfranz


More drinking might help. Water that is. Drinking more water. Point beer would work too, but it's hard to come by some places. Anyway, while there's variation in system function, proper hydration improves efficiancy. My oldest son is as looooooong pooper. When he's properly hydrated though, he doesn't take nearly so long.


TMI, doood, TMI. So is the whole damn thread.

Please, from now on, keep yer shit to yourself. Piss, too.

kfranz
March 17, 2009, 11:42
Originally posted by HughJass



TMI, doood, TMI. So is the whole damn thread.

Please, from now on, keep yer shit to yourself. Piss, too.

Look at your avatar, then tell me again with a straight face about TMI. :beer: