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Old June 01, 2012, 11:46   #1
sportsnut
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Standard Operating Procedures for FAL Shoot Barbecuing

Standard Operating Procedures for Oregon FAL Shoot Barbecuing

If there isn't a viable woman around just plug in the next best option


BBQ RULES
We are about to enter the BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity . When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:

Routine...
(1) The woman buys the food.
(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
(4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three meter exclusion zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities can take place without the interference of the woman.
Here comes the important part:
(5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
More routine...
(6) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
(7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he flips the meat
Important again:
( THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

More routine...
(9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
(10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
And most important of all:
(11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
(12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed ' her night off ', and, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women.
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Old June 01, 2012, 14:19   #2
snowhawk jockey
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So what you are saying is that you are bringing an apron for yourself and several skirts for your assistants, so they may properly (ob)serve their role... to the master!
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Old June 01, 2012, 15:27   #3
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Oh hell yes, I'll wear one. I am bringing a salad, after all.
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Old June 01, 2012, 17:02   #4
sportsnut
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Quote:
Originally Posted by snowhawk jockey View Post
So what you are saying is that you are bringing an apron for yourself and several skirts for your assistants, so they may properly (ob)serve their role... to the master!



I was hoping someone would bring that para-cord skirt that Plukat looks so nice in....
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Old June 01, 2012, 18:49   #5
4x401
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Quote:
Originally Posted by brunop View Post
Oh hell yes, I'll wear one. I am tossing a salad, after all.
FIFY
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Old June 01, 2012, 18:52   #6
4x401
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sportsnut View Post
I was hoping someone would bring that para-cord skirt that Plukat looks so nice in....
I can bring a freshly washed camo banana hammock for him to wear, if that would get your BBQ motor running.
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Old June 01, 2012, 18:53   #7
4x401
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sportsnut View Post
Standard Operating Procedures for Oregon FAL Shoot Barbecuing

If there isn't a viable woman around just plug in the next best option


BBQ RULES
We are about to enter the BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity . When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:

Routine...
(1) The woman buys the food.
(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
(4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three meter exclusion zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities can take place without the interference of the woman.
Here comes the important part:
(5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
More routine...
(6) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
(7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he flips the meat
Important again:
( THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

More routine...
(9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
(10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
And most important of all:
(11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
(12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed ' her night off ', and, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women.
Are you really married
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Old June 01, 2012, 19:00   #8
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Are you really married

22 years this September !

Yeah I know, she scored.
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Old June 01, 2012, 19:03   #9
4x401
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Originally Posted by sportsnut View Post
22 years this September !
Thats awesome brother!

My wonderful wife and I are 21 yrs. this November.
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Old June 01, 2012, 19:10   #10
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Hell yeah, sounds like both the Ladies scored !!
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Old June 01, 2012, 19:32   #11
4x401
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Originally Posted by sportsnut View Post
Hell yeah, sounds like both the Ladies scored !!
Well I'd like to think we Both scored
But honestly, she's better than I deserve most of the time.
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Old June 01, 2012, 21:03   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sportsnut View Post
I was hoping someone would bring that para-cord skirt that Plukat looks so nice in....
Since he wore the aXX out of it last time, I have been knitting him another. Probably won't have it done until next years gig, though, with all the para cord needed to contain his manliness...
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Old June 02, 2012, 00:49   #13
sportsnut
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Quote:
Originally Posted by snowhawk jockey View Post
Since he wore the aXX out of it last time, I have been knitting him another. Probably won't have it done until next years gig, though, with all the para cord needed to contain his manliness...




Gotta love it...
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Old June 02, 2012, 00:54   #14
sportsnut
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 4x401 View Post
Well I'd like to think we Both scored
But honestly, she's better than I deserve most of the time.



I hear ya there, I have to pinch myself daily.
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Old June 06, 2012, 23:29   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by snowhawk jockey View Post
So what you are saying is that you are bringing an apron for yourself and several skirts for your assistants, so they may properly (ob)serve their role... to the master!

Does it make me less of a man for asking my wife to bring me an apron last Sunday? I was making Chicken Tikka Masala and the sauce was starting to splatter a bit on my favorite new(er) OD green t-shirt. She happily complied, ate my fantastic culinary creation, and did the dishes...Honest, that's how it happened.
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Old June 07, 2012, 17:44   #16
snowhawk jockey
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tailback View Post
Does it make me less of a man for asking my wife to bring me an apron last Sunday? I was making Chicken Tikka Masala and the sauce was starting to splatter a bit on my favorite new(er) OD green t-shirt. She happily complied, ate my fantastic culinary creation, and did the dishes...Honest, that's how it happened.
To be honest, it only makes you less of a man, if you >wear< your apron like a skirt. Since you were obviously using it to protect the *OD shirt* from splatter, that means you are in the clear. Had it been deployed to cover just the parts your supposed to wipe you hands on (pants), would it have been a questionable action
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