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Old May 15, 2018, 22:17   #1
Jaxxas
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DNA tests, Soap Opera 101

Kinda a long rambling story so I will try to cut it to the more interesting bits...

My sister died Thanksgiving last year. Tough time for all but my daughter was particularly affected. My sister never had children and always treated my daughter as her own.

My daughter got fairly serious about our family after my sister's death, interested in genealogy and the whole bit asking lots of questions about the family. I put her in touch with my last aunt from my mother's side, a still quick witted woman in her 90's, and she revealed that my mother had had a couple of children with a man other than my father after they were divorced and those children were adopted out. My daughter thought we should try to find them.


So we talked it over and I bought us a couple of DNA test kits ($79 each) from Ancestry.com and we took the tests. I figured what the hell, sounds like fun, be a cool diversion. Weirdly enough I 'failed' my DNA test (you got to be real STUPID to fail a DNA test!) So they sent me a new test while my daughters results had already been posted on the Ancestry.com website. We really didn't know what to make of my daughters results, they showed a few highly likely matches with names none of us recognized. We really didn't pay much attention to the results at that point because we didn't know what to make of them.

So a number of weeks go by and my second results finally come in. I log in after work and I'm looking over my highly likely matches and I'm seeing a bunch of surnames from my father and mothers side of the family. So I'm browsing through it all trying to understand the software and what the results mean when it finally dawned on me that my highly likely matches didn't include my daughter.

I spent the next 4-5 hours reading up on DNA tests and how to use the Ancestry.com website and I finally realized I wasn't doing anything wrong with the software and that I did understand the basics of how DNA works. My daughter wasn't my biological daughter.

I realized 3 things at that point; 1, There wasn't anything I could do about it. 2, I had already divorced the mother 20 years ago. 3, It didn't change anything about how I felt about my daughter or grandchildren.

So before I went to bed I texted my daughter (in Texas) that my results had came in and that there was something fairly seriously wrong with the results. As we have both shared our Ancestry.com logins with each other she would be able to login into my account in the morning.

So with much fanfare, back and forth the next day, finally realizing that she had absolutely zero matches with any of my family surnames, she called and questioned Ancestry.com 2-4 times that day. Each time they were completely apologetic, saying yes we understand sometimes these things come out. They most sympathetically explained that their error rate was something like .05%. They eventually sent her a second DNA test for confirmation. My daughter was fairly distraught, for my part I had already accepted reality.

My daughter then confronts my my ex-wife. Ex-wife totally denies any other possibilities, very indignant even angry. "How dare you believe science over your own Mother's word!?" I told my daughter well that's an easy question! My daughter was actually worried my ex would disown or shut her completely out of her life.

These were a number of very tumultuous days!

So, finally I had to talk to the ex, and convinced her that it wasn't any big deal. I was over it so she should be too. (She wasn't) Then I ordered another DNA test from another company that was strictly a parternity/maternity test ($140) that included the child. Ex and I got together and took the test then we sent it to our daughter in Texas, our daughter tested and sent in the results and we had answers within a week.

RESULTS---->I am not the biological father, and my ex is the mother (rules out switched at birth, I know but she was desperate!)

So here we are with 2 DNA tests that confirm I'm not the father and the ex is still in denial.

My daughter's second Ancestry.com DNA test results com back and we now have a 3rd test confirming I'm not the father. Ex is even still in denial.


My daughter moves on, looks in depth at her likely DNA matches and it turns out the top 2 are sisters, from near where these deeds took place 40 some odd years ago.

Now my daughter is hell on wheels when it comes to research, one smart cookie, hard to believe she isn't related! So within a couple of days she has pretty much identified her biological father. Even found a yearbook picture. Anybody here live in Parker Colorado?

At this point she is determining whether to attempt contact or not with the biological father and then how the best way to attempt contact. Whatever she decides I support her.

The Ex is still in denial, the daughter is more than a little pissed at mom.

Pretty much up to date at this point....

Anyway just thought I share a slice of my life.......
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Old May 15, 2018, 22:35   #2
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Wow! Very interesting. I've got some thoughts about your ex, but I will keep them to myself. Are you experiencing any shadenfreude over her discomfort? Your daughter, biological or not, seems like a cool cookie. I guess she owes a good bit of that quality to you. Biological or not in this case, you seem like a pretty good dad.

Good on you, Sir!
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Old May 15, 2018, 22:45   #3
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Story time winner! Even though it appears you aren't biologically related, sounds like you two are the best for each other. Thats a heckuva thing to learn. Best of luck to you and YOUR daughter!
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Old May 15, 2018, 23:07   #4
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It's good that you're taking it well. Moral of the story is it doesn't matter what the DNA is, what matters is what is in the heart.
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Old May 15, 2018, 23:07   #5
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Originally Posted by Jaxxas View Post
Kinda a long rambling story so I will try to cut it to the more interesting bits...

My sister died Thanksgiving last year. Tough time for all but my daughter was particularly affected. My sister never had children and always treated my daughter as her own.

My daughter got fairly serious about our family after my sister's death, interested in genealogy and the whole bit asking lots of questions about the family. I put her in touch with my last aunt from my mother's side, a still quick witted woman in her 90's, and she revealed that my mother had had a couple of children with a man other than my father after they were divorced and those children were adopted out. My daughter thought we should try to find them.


So we talked it over and I bought us a couple of DNA test kits ($79 each) from Ancestry.com and we took the tests. I figured what the hell, sounds like fun, be a cool diversion. Weirdly enough I 'failed' my DNA test (you got to be real STUPID to fail a DNA test!) So they sent me a new test while my daughters results had already been posted on the Ancestry.com website. We really didn't know what to make of my daughters results, they showed a few highly likely matches with names none of us recognized. We really didn't pay much attention to the results at that point because we didn't know what to make of them.

So a number of weeks go by and my second results finally come in. I log in after work and I'm looking over my highly likely matches and I'm seeing a bunch of surnames from my father and mothers side of the family. So I'm browsing through it all trying to understand the software and what the results mean when it finally dawned on me that my highly likely matches didn't include my daughter.

I spent the next 4-5 hours reading up on DNA tests and how to use the Ancestry.com website and I finally realized I wasn't doing anything wrong with the software and that I did understand the basics of how DNA works. My daughter wasn't my biological daughter.

I realized 3 things at that point; 1, There wasn't anything I could do about it. 2, I had already divorced the mother 20 years ago. 3, It didn't change anything about how I felt about my daughter or grandchildren.

So before I went to bed I texted my daughter (in Texas) that my results had came in and that there was something fairly seriously wrong with the results. As we have both shared our Ancestry.com logins with each other she would be able to login into my account in the morning.

So with much fanfare, back and forth the next day, finally realizing that she had absolutely zero matches with any of my family surnames, she called and questioned Ancestry.com 2-4 times that day. Each time they were completely apologetic, saying yes we understand sometimes these things come out. They most sympathetically explained that their error rate was something like .05%. They eventually sent her a second DNA test for confirmation. My daughter was fairly distraught, for my part I had already accepted reality.

My daughter then confronts my my ex-wife. Ex-wife totally denies any other possibilities, very indignant even angry. "How dare you believe science over your own Mother's word!?" I told my daughter well that's an easy question! My daughter was actually worried my ex would disown or shut her completely out of her life.

These were a number of very tumultuous days!

So, finally I had to talk to the ex, and convinced her that it wasn't any big deal. I was over it so she should be too. (She wasn't) Then I ordered another DNA test from another company that was strictly a parternity/maternity test ($140) that included the child. Ex and I got together and took the test then we sent it to our daughter in Texas, our daughter tested and sent in the results and we had answers within a week.

RESULTS---->I am not the biological father, and my ex is the mother (rules out switched at birth, I know but she was desperate!)

So here we are with 2 DNA tests that confirm I'm not the father and the ex is still in denial.

My daughter's second Ancestry.com DNA test results com back and we now have a 3rd test confirming I'm not the father. Ex is even still in denial.


My daughter moves on, looks in depth at her likely DNA matches and it turns out the top 2 are sisters, from near where these deeds took place 40 some odd years ago.

Now my daughter is hell on wheels when it comes to research, one smart cookie, hard to believe she isn't related! So within a couple of days she has pretty much identified her biological father. Even found a yearbook picture. Anybody here live in Parker Colorado?

At this point she is determining whether to attempt contact or not with the biological father and then how the best way to attempt contact. Whatever she decides I support her.

The Ex is still in denial, the daughter is more than a little pissed at mom.

Pretty much up to date at this point....

Anyway just thought I share a slice of my life.......
The Ex's denial is that technology caught her, not that she didn't fugk another guy instead of you. Maybe you can go on Springer or Maury and make some money off this now?
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Old May 15, 2018, 23:16   #6
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The Ex's denial is that technology caught her, not that she didn't fugk another guy instead of you. Maybe you can go on Springer or Maury and make some money off this now?
Jeebus..
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Old May 15, 2018, 23:23   #7
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Jeebus..
Well, isn't that what you do when you find your life has been a real-life soap opera?
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Old May 15, 2018, 23:39   #8
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an old physiologist i used to do work for gave me a bit of advice when my dad went missing. he told me to be careful when looking for people cause sometimes they don't want to be found. about a year latter my dads body was recovered in the woods. he had committed suicide.

i dont think his advice meant that my dad was dead but its just how it worked out. i think he was talking about the living but they're are parallels to both situations. had my dad wanted to be found he never would have left the house that day.
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Old May 15, 2018, 23:40   #9
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Well, isn't that what you do when you find your life has been a real-life soap opera?
No.

As a matter of fact, I have some "Real life-soap opera" crap happening right now...and some folks have suggested I take it to the media. No. Fugging. Thank you.
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Old May 16, 2018, 00:20   #10
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It's good that you're taking it well. Moral of the story is it doesn't matter what the DNA is, what matters is what is in the heart.

Very true.

My stepdaughter (although I refer to her as my daughter) is with her second child.....looking like a boy....she wants to name him after me....much to the chagrin of her biological father. And to her first child I am none other than papa...her biological grandafter is just some guy to her.
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Old May 16, 2018, 00:45   #11
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It's good that you're taking it well. Moral of the story is it doesn't matter what the DNA is, what matters is what is in the heart.
.......this.... absolutely this. Long story but I was adopted and end up raised by my adoptive mother (my adoptive father passed away when I was 18 months old). I have known since I was about 10. This never ever changed the way at all I looked at my mother (I only used "adoptive" above to make the distinction for this tale) as anything but that. I have, unlike many, had no burning inner desire to know about the people who's DNA gave life to me, they are just that, my values, principles and most would say, stunning good looks, are all from my mother.
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Old May 16, 2018, 11:15   #12
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With genetics being the cause of many problems like breast cancer and the like it is important to know what is what. Good that your daughter is tracking this down. I got to admit that what you found out is a nice direct kick in the nuts from the ex-wife.
The other guy is only a sperm doner not your daughters father, you are.
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Of course it is a true story. You just couldn't make up something like that, no way.
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Old May 16, 2018, 11:24   #13
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The Ex's denial is that technology caught her, not that she didn't fugk another guy instead of you. Maybe you can go on Springer or Maury and make some money off this now?
Cause it is not official until one of them says it is!
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Old May 16, 2018, 12:17   #14
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My wife and I did an Ancestry.com DNA test for the hell of it.

1. I had always assumed I was German -- nope 75% British

2. My wife is part Eastern European (her dad) and Scottish (mom).

3. So here's the interesting thing -- Ancestry will give you contact information with someone who has taken their test and is a close genetic match -- like a possible cousin. They won't give you a name or direct contact info, just a link through Ancestry. Both my wife's parents are dead. Father for 30+ years, mother just recently in 2016. So there's a hit of a close relative for my wife. Real close relative -- as in most likely a sibling. Thing is, she's an only child. This person has no Eastern European DNA. So using what scant info Ancestry had on that person, my wife tracked down a woman living in California, 10 years older than her, who looks an awful lot like her and her mother. At the time this woman would have been born, my mother in law was single (late 1950's). So my wife sent her a message through Ancestry a few days ago. So far we've heard nothing. We know where she lives, who she's married to, what she does for a job, contact info, etc. We figured we'd put the ball in her court and let her decide. Problem is, it's not clear whether Ancestry contacts these people or just posts it on their web page. This woman took the test a year ago, so we know about her, but not vice versa. Amazing (and kind of scary) what you can find on the internet.
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Old May 16, 2018, 12:46   #15
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You are a bigger man than I am. If I ever had kids and then found out I raised them, but is not the father, it would devastate me.

My wife and I got the Ancestry kits as a Christmas present from her son. I also thought I was predominantly Dutch/French. Come to find out I am like 47% English (and I hate the bastages), some 25% Western European, and various others. My Irish American wife is less English than I am. And my ex (American) wife is more Dutch/French than I am..

But at least nobody contacted me yet claiming I am their father..
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Old May 16, 2018, 12:47   #16
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Don't be so hard on the exwife....what if she were raped and doesn't want to tell the daughter she is the spawn of a rapist. Some things are better left unsaid.....now it's said. Delete this thread.
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Old May 16, 2018, 14:11   #17
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My wife did the DNA test through Ancestry around Christmas 2017. Found out her dad is not her dad which is a hell of a thing to discover at 47 years old.

Confronted her mom and she fessed up about the other guy who was a fcuk buddy when she was dating my wife's 'father'. Wife traced 2nd and 3rd cousins via Ancestry and some hints given to her by mom. She found her bio dad but he died several years ago. Also found his sons and daughters, one of whom my wife connected with. Apparently bio dad was a player and a baby daddy to several other kids with other women.

My wife now has a nice online and phone relationship with her *new* family but the elephant in the room is the man she has known all her life as her dad. Her mom and dad are still married and he is oblivious to the fact my wife is not his biological daughter. My wife is struggling to deal with her desire to have a full and open relationship with her new family while keeping a secret from the man she has called Dad her entire life.

She loves her dad very much and doesn't want to hurt him but she has always wanted a big family to share her life with. She now has this opportunity but because the new family all live in MT, she can't just slip off to see them, mainly because her mom and dad live 5 minutes away and they see each other nearly every day. She has seen a therapist as she is really hurting mentally with this.

She is terrified other members of her father's family who have also taken the DNA test will tell her dad that she doesn't share any connection with him or their side of the family. My wife would rather have her mom tell her dad about the results so she can be open and honest about the situation. Her mom refuses to do so and my wife is being torn apart by it. My advice has been to confront her mom and give her an ultimatum: tell her hubby within 2 weeks or my wife will. Damn awkward situation for sure.
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Old May 16, 2018, 14:17   #18
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But at least nobody contacted me yet claiming I am their father..
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Old May 16, 2018, 14:24   #19
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Old May 16, 2018, 15:00   #20
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My daughter then confronts my my ex-wife. Ex-wife totally denies any other possibilities, very indignant even angry. "How dare you believe science over your own Mother's word!?" I told my daughter well that's an easy question! My daughter was actually worried my ex would disown or shut her completely out of her life.
The fact that she got indignant and mad is a clear clue that she's lying through her teeth of course.

Like you said not much you can do, other than brutal bloody revenge...if that's your cup of tea.
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Old May 16, 2018, 15:04   #21
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Jaxxas...your daughter has got to be thinking you are Captain Awesomesauce,rolling along unphased in your love for your daughter,even when evidence like this is right there. And she is likely re-assessing her whole daughter/mom relationship,wondering what else has ole' mom got hidden in her past. You are doing exactly the right thing,as far as I am concerned.
And mom? Hope she isn't counting on a kidney or something in the future....
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Old May 16, 2018, 15:10   #22
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OLD JEWISH SAYING, you can generally be sure of your mother but your dad could be anyone, Jewish girls tend to lie about their pregnancies, JUST ASK MARY, ?who is Jesus dad, ? GOD? I don't know, and that started a religion...
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Old May 16, 2018, 15:11   #23
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I took one of these and found I'm not black (whew!) and that despite expecting English and German to be my ancestry, have no specifically English markers (despite the surname) and am Germanic, Celtic and Scandinavian with trace Iberian, Eastern Euro (Slavic), Finnish and Southern Euro (Greco-Italian) ancestors.

I now intend to call myself "Hispanic" on every future Census thanks to those Iberian genes - too bad I didn't know sooner so I could've played the game for college scholarships.
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Old May 16, 2018, 16:51   #24
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Women are pretty damn wicked. My 1st wife was a real winner. We got married young. She was pretty much a whore most of the time. I stuck it out to get my daughter out of the house. Day she went to college I got the hell out. I am secure in knowing my daughter is mine by her features and little tics that I had that she never observed from me.

Ex and I separated for about a year one time early on. She came back and her belly started getting bigger. Said she was 6 or so months pregnant after we had been back together for 6 months. She delivered the 1st full term kid in the history of humanity in 7 months. she put it up for adoption. I stuck it out to get my daughter grown and didn’t look back. Pure damn deceit. She’s living with some guy that was a friend of mine 20 years ago. They deserve each other.

Sorry to hear this Jax
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Old May 16, 2018, 17:07   #25
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I'm with RSU - it's the heart that matters.

That's a helluva story from a helluva man (and daughter).

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Old May 16, 2018, 17:33   #26
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DO NOT trust those DNA sites, they are usually BS. Find a real DNA testing facility, the ones that are used for paternity and law enforcement.

A guy on another board had his tested by one of those site. I think it might have been 23 and me. He knows for a fact that three of his four grandparents were verified to have come to the US from Sweden. The forth came from Norway. His test results showed 0 percent for either of those two countries.
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Old May 16, 2018, 21:41   #27
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My wife got me a DNA test kit (2nd wife,no kids for us !) and I'm not doing it. I was a bit of a cad back in the day and maybe,just maybe, have several children. I'm at peace with the 2 I know , thank you very much.
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Old May 16, 2018, 22:11   #28
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Life is a gas. Anyway Kali has kept DNA samples of every newborn in the state since 1983,they are researching birth to death it sounds like but they took the samples without permission. How folks use your DNA sample may go far past ancestry, it may affect your health insurance.

Daughter has traced family for many years on ancestry dot Com and it's all cool what you find out. Sometimes the biggest suprised walks up to your front door. Woman introduced herself as my mother's daughter that was adopted out. About fell on the floor as she looked exactly like mom who died a little while before. Agency gave out my mom's name after she died.

Dad died when I was two and left my mom with 7 kids and a 4th grade education...and pregnant.
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Old May 16, 2018, 23:01   #29
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First off thanks to all of you for the kind thoughts and comments. I'll try to get to individual comments a bit later.

Also just an FYI, I sent my daughter a link to this thread. She thought the comment about 'hoping mom never needs a kidney' was pretty funny. And she sympathizes with g-mans wife.
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Old May 16, 2018, 23:02   #30
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Originally Posted by Arby View Post
Are you experiencing any shadenfreude over her discomfort? !
Just a very small wee bit!
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Old May 16, 2018, 23:03   #31
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Originally Posted by SWOHFAL View Post
The Ex's denial is that technology caught her, not that she didn't fugk another guy instead of you. Maybe you can go on Springer or Maury and make some money off this now?

Probably not, appreciate the suggestion though!
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Old May 16, 2018, 23:05   #32
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Originally Posted by HelpiFALanCantGetUp View Post
an old physiologist i used to do work for gave me a bit of advice when my dad went missing. he told me to be careful when looking for people cause sometimes they don't want to be found. about a year latter my dads body was recovered in the woods. he had committed suicide.

i dont think his advice meant that my dad was dead but its just how it worked out. i think he was talking about the living but they're are parallels to both situations. had my dad wanted to be found he never would have left the house that day.
Yes I understand the concept, though I'ma habitual door opener!
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Old May 16, 2018, 23:06   #33
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It's good that you're taking it well. Moral of the story is it doesn't matter what the DNA is, what matters is what is in the heart.

Thanks RSU, pretty much sums it up for me!
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Old May 16, 2018, 23:07   #34
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Originally Posted by Sagerider View Post
With genetics being the cause of many problems like breast cancer and the like it is important to know what is what. Good that your daughter is tracking this down. I got to admit that what you found out is a nice direct kick in the nuts from the ex-wife.
The other guy is only a sperm doner not your daughters father, you are.
Thanks Sage,

From my point of view this is not about me, it's all about my daughter.
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Old May 16, 2018, 23:09   #35
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My wife and I did an Ancestry.com DNA test for the hell of it.

1. I had always assumed I was German -- nope 75% British

2. My wife is part Eastern European (her dad) and Scottish (mom).

3. So here's the interesting thing -- Ancestry will give you contact information with someone who has taken their test and is a close genetic match -- like a possible cousin. They won't give you a name or direct contact info, just a link through Ancestry. Both my wife's parents are dead. Father for 30+ years, mother just recently in 2016. So there's a hit of a close relative for my wife. Real close relative -- as in most likely a sibling. Thing is, she's an only child. This person has no Eastern European DNA. So using what scant info Ancestry had on that person, my wife tracked down a woman living in California, 10 years older than her, who looks an awful lot like her and her mother. At the time this woman would have been born, my mother in law was single (late 1950's). So my wife sent her a message through Ancestry a few days ago. So far we've heard nothing. We know where she lives, who she's married to, what she does for a job, contact info, etc. We figured we'd put the ball in her court and let her decide. Problem is, it's not clear whether Ancestry contacts these people or just posts it on their web page. This woman took the test a year ago, so we know about her, but not vice versa. Amazing (and kind of scary) what you can find on the internet.
If you contact them through Ancestry.com it sends them an email, I say go for it!
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Old May 16, 2018, 23:10   #36
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You are a bigger man than I am. If I ever had kids and then found out I raised them, but is not the father, it would devastate me.

My wife and I got the Ancestry kits as a Christmas present from her son. I also thought I was predominantly Dutch/French. Come to find out I am like 47% English (and I hate the bastages), some 25% Western European, and various others. My Irish American wife is less English than I am. And my ex (American) wife is more Dutch/French than I am..

But at least nobody contacted me yet claiming I am their father..
Thanks hagar, I feel more like a bit player in this scenario!
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Old May 16, 2018, 23:12   #37
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Don't be so hard on the exwife....what if she were raped and doesn't want to tell the daughter she is the spawn of a rapist. Some things are better left unsaid.....now it's said. Delete this thread.
Actually I haven't said a single unkind word to her. I won't mention some of the things I've thought though!
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Old May 16, 2018, 23:15   #38
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My wife did the DNA test through Ancestry around Christmas 2017. Found out her dad is not her dad which is a hell of a thing to discover at 47 years old.

Confronted her mom and she fessed up about the other guy who was a fcuk buddy when she was dating my wife's 'father'. Wife traced 2nd and 3rd cousins via Ancestry and some hints given to her by mom. She found her bio dad but he died several years ago. Also found his sons and daughters, one of whom my wife connected with. Apparently bio dad was a player and a baby daddy to several other kids with other women.

My wife now has a nice online and phone relationship with her *new* family but the elephant in the room is the man she has known all her life as her dad. Her mom and dad are still married and he is oblivious to the fact my wife is not his biological daughter. My wife is struggling to deal with her desire to have a full and open relationship with her new family while keeping a secret from the man she has called Dad her entire life.

She loves her dad very much and doesn't want to hurt him but she has always wanted a big family to share her life with. She now has this opportunity but because the new family all live in MT, she can't just slip off to see them, mainly because her mom and dad live 5 minutes away and they see each other nearly every day. She has seen a therapist as she is really hurting mentally with this.

She is terrified other members of her father's family who have also taken the DNA test will tell her dad that she doesn't share any connection with him or their side of the family. My wife would rather have her mom tell her dad about the results so she can be open and honest about the situation. Her mom refuses to do so and my wife is being torn apart by it. My advice has been to confront her mom and give her an ultimatum: tell her hubby within 2 weeks or my wife will. Damn awkward situation for sure.
Gman my daughter was particularly taken with your wife's plight, thinks she has much worse problems than herself. I hope your wife makes mom fess up, it's good for the soul!
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Old May 16, 2018, 23:18   #39
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The fact that she got indignant and mad is a clear clue that she's lying through her teeth of course.

Like you said not much you can do, other than brutal bloody revenge...if that's your cup of tea.
Agreed! Having known my ex for over 40 years now, I know she has issues that are hard to explain. The woman remembers nothing of her childhood from about 13 and earlier. Nothing! It could be a lie, but after 40 years she is pretty convincing! Of course I don't have to listen to her anymore either!
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Old May 16, 2018, 23:21   #40
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Jaxxas...your daughter has got to be thinking you are Captain Awesomesauce,rolling along unphased in your love for your daughter,even when evidence like this is right there. And she is likely re-assessing her whole daughter/mom relationship,wondering what else has ole' mom got hidden in her past. You are doing exactly the right thing,as far as I am concerned.
And mom? Hope she isn't counting on a kidney or something in the future....
Thanks RG, she's my daughter, I can do no more.

She laughed at your kidney comment, she thought maybe a pancreas!
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Old May 16, 2018, 23:23   #41
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I took one of these and found I'm not black (whew!) and that despite expecting English and German to be my ancestry, have no specifically English markers (despite the surname) and am Germanic, Celtic and Scandinavian with trace Iberian, Eastern Euro (Slavic), Finnish and Southern Euro (Greco-Italian) ancestors.

I now intend to call myself "Hispanic" on every future Census thanks to those Iberian genes - too bad I didn't know sooner so I could've played the game for college scholarships.
Mine says I'm 81% English and at the far end 1% Bantu, but I keep that under wraps!
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Old May 16, 2018, 23:24   #42
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DO NOT trust those DNA sites, they are usually BS. Find a real DNA testing facility, the ones that are used for paternity and law enforcement.

A guy on another board had his tested by one of those site. I think it might have been 23 and me. He knows for a fact that three of his four grandparents were verified to have come to the US from Sweden. The forth came from Norway. His test results showed 0 percent for either of those two countries.

So my options are trust science or trust my EX? I think I'll go with science!
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Old May 16, 2018, 23:28   #43
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Women are pretty damn wicked. My 1st wife was a real winner. We got married young. She was pretty much a whore most of the time. I stuck it out to get my daughter out of the house. Day she went to college I got the hell out. I am secure in knowing my daughter is mine by her features and little tics that I had that she never observed from me.

Ex and I separated for about a year one time early on. She came back and her belly started getting bigger. Said she was 6 or so months pregnant after we had been back together for 6 months. She delivered the 1st full term kid in the history of humanity in 7 months. she put it up for adoption. I stuck it out to get my daughter grown and didnt look back. Pure damn deceit. Shes living with some guy that was a friend of mine 20 years ago. They deserve each other.

Sorry to hear this Jax
Thanks Melt!

We have a bit of different story. We stuck together for 20 years till our daughter left home and then the ex had a better job offer in another city. We were sitting around spinning our thumbs before her job offer came through. We (I) really had no idea why we were still married!
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Old May 17, 2018, 08:02   #44
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Great story!
I agree completely with RSU, also.

My wife was adopted and raised by fantastic parents.
At the behest of her sister, wifey found her bio mom back in the early 2000's.
She could not get a straight answer from her bio mom about who her bio dad was, but she did meet some half brothers in the deal.
Finally got a lead from her half brothers, so wifey and potential bio dad took DNA tests...no match.
Bio mom died without resolution as to who bio dad was.

A couple years ago, I gave wifey gift of Ancestry DNA test and input all the known family info to the site for her.
Confirmed she has Greek, Italian and Irish roots.

Out of the blue a few months ago, a guy contacts her through Ancestry and turns out to be her cousin.
He has done a ton of detailed familial research and as it turns out, his long dead uncle was wifey's dad!

So, at the age of 51, now knows who her bio dad was and has acquired some half sisters, an aunt and a grandmother!
I just try to be supportive and think it is cool she is learning all this, at long last.
Her newfound cousin seems like a super smart and decent guy, and we hope to meet him someday soon.

Wifey now says, "hey, I'm no longer a bastard child!"
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Old May 17, 2018, 08:58   #45
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If you contact them through Ancestry.com it sends them an email, I say go for it!
My wife sent her a notice through Ancestry a few days ago. We've heard nothing back. She was a little concerned that it might not get delivered if the recipient wasn't a currently paying member of Ancestry. I guess you're saying no.

Good story you had. And I would have had the same reaction -- my kids are my kids, regardless of DNA.
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Old May 17, 2018, 09:10   #46
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Originally Posted by partisan50 View Post
DO NOT trust those DNA sites, they are usually BS. Find a real DNA testing facility, the ones that are used for paternity and law enforcement.

A guy on another board had his tested by one of those site. I think it might have been 23 and me. He knows for a fact that three of his four grandparents were verified to have come to the US from Sweden. The forth came from Norway. His test results showed 0 percent for either of those two countries.
This guy may have been adopted..

I though mine was pretty damn accurate. All I sent them was some spit, and they told me when my ancestors arrived in South Africa, and how they spread. They also linked me to people there, no way it could have been a big guess..
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Old May 17, 2018, 11:19   #47
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Originally Posted by Jaxxas View Post
Mine says I'm 81% English and at the far end 1% Bantu, but I keep that under wraps!
Theres always a piece of black walnut in the woodpile...
Larry
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Old May 17, 2018, 12:12   #48
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I did the Ancestry.com DNA test.

Found out I'm my own grandpa!




Actually, my wife and I did do the DNA test and are waiting for the results.
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Old May 17, 2018, 13:44   #49
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I did the Ancestry.com DNA test.

Found out I'm my own grandpa!




Actually, my wife and I did do the DNA test and are waiting for the results.
ray stevens version, version by Homer and Jethro is better





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Old May 17, 2018, 13:47   #50
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kudos to you Jax, at least your daughter (by virtue of your raising her) is on your side

you cannot buy that kind of attack against your ex, you have done the best thing by letting your daughter "skin the ex alive"
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