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adam762
December 21, 2015, 16:17
Slow, disorganized, increasingly difficult to deal with. Promises schedules he can't keep.

On the up side, if you are local, he will make time for you anytime to come work on anything you want. If you have a build party the coming weekend he will turn your parts around in less than 48 hours. If your project has been there for a while he will likely give you some freebies, and he will take time to talk to you long after normal business hours on nights and weekends.

Work quality is first rate. Creative, economical, and frequently the only place to go for special custom machine work or projects. If you're willing to wait a year, risk losing parts, and chance getting yelled at.

What the hell is going on??

This started out as a review of the beef with flypaper, and while there's more to that story, after some thought it became obvious that wasn't the REAL story here. You're witnessing the implosion of a long time member who's contributed a lot to the board, community, and hobby. I'm at the 'Hey, get some help, guy' stage and a withdrawl is in order but it's going to be orderly and with cause, and not just a vanishing act.

My boy came to me at 17 months old after police raided his mothers home at midnight and found him in the middle of the living room, soaked in urine, screaming, with intoxicated people all around and mother nowhere to be found. He's had some issues all his life, and after 15 years of raising him by myself, it's looking more and more like fetal alcohol syndrome is involved. He's been kicked off sports teams, out of a school district, barely dodged theft charges for an Ipad he took from school, managed a 1.4 GPA, and now over the summer abused his 4 year old cousin and is facing three felony charges. I walked away from a career in aviation ten years ago to be a father and raise my child at home, and I've SACRIFICED to make that happen. I've NEVER been a good business man. Clever with machinery, imagineative, yes, but the wrong guy to try to do this by myself. My two attempts at forming partnerships went sour, as any who recall the Norvell debacle will attest. At this point, with these legal issues consuming so much of my time and sanity, I look at the complaints leveled against me and think 'They're right. You just aren't fit anymore.'

Some of the mistakes were honest. I took on more than I could chew because in a world of feast or famine, you always take more than you can eat and try to carry it for a while. I also tried to be accomodating to locals, family members, and oh-please-can-you-hurry type things. That's not always so good of an idea. Then I promised my 91 year old farmer/WWII vet/lab technician/ham radio operator grandfather that none of the stuff in his garage would get thrown away when we cleaned it out. The time and resources lost in keeping that promise over the summer were spectacular. Not the best for business but the right thing to do, right? Taking in the projects agreeing to hot blue when at the time I could not hot blue myself and could not really control when it was going to happen was a mistake. Ambitious but foolish. September was starting to look up until the abuse allegations hit, and it's just fallen apart since then.

So I was thinking about Dean, and I realized I was pretty damned mad. He's been picking, it's inappropriate and I was pissed, especially after I tried to do him a favor with the extra set of prints. But I was TOO mad. I read my words again, and a calm voice said 'time to step back for a bit.'

Dean is right about his gas block. Rick and Mike are right about their wait times, but they WILL get their hiders. They're here. They have to be. Mike is also right about the poo flingers - if it's flying, there's prolly a reason. The reason is me.

The attorneys for the kid suggest that he go live with my parents for a couple of years while the very time consuming outpatient treatment is done. There is a general agreement that I cannot sustain my current level of involvement by myself, and that the home situation for the kid and I is becoming stressed to the point of being dangerous for everyone involved. So, most likely, after the first of the year he will go to live with my parents. I am going to blow the dust off my passport and see if KBR will put me in Kandahar or someplace nice for a vacation. I have ten years of retirement to catch up on, and I would like nothing better than to be able to focus on my work and ignore the world. In the mean time, all projects here presently will be finished. Absolutely no more work will be taken. I am done for the forseeable future. I will not leave with unfinished work still here.

A man can only handle so much. It has become obvious that I am not managing to properly handle myself professionally, and as much as I would like to see the reasons for that get dealt with and not exist, I don't think it's going to happen for a while.

This is the reviews section, and that is an honest assessment of myself at this point.

W.E.G.
December 21, 2015, 16:33
It takes a strong man to make a post like that.

Adam stay strong. You already have the courage.

Prayers that your family situation finds a center, and that all can move up from this low point.

tdb59
December 21, 2015, 16:45
It takes a strong man to make a post like that.

Adam stay strong. You already have the courage.

Prayers that your family situation finds a center, and that all can move up from this low point.

What he said.

FWIW, I am impressed with a man that is willing to look inside, as I do know that it is not an easy task.


:smile:

Eyeguy
December 21, 2015, 16:55
It takes a strong man to make a post like that.

Adam stay strong. You already have the courage.

Prayers that your family situation finds a center, and that all can move up from this low point.

+1

I realize I'm a relative newbie here but having had some recent business dealings with you I feel compelled to respond.

My experience with you Adam has been nothing but positive. I've been the benefactor of your willing to take calls after hours and the knowledge you've shared freely is more than appreciated.

Your decision to place family first earns my respect and your sharing of the challenges you face takes great courage as noted above.

Prayers from Florida that your decision renders the results you seek.

Nothing but the best of wishes to you, your son and Andrea.

Invictus77
December 21, 2015, 17:16
I am sorry to hear of your troubles Adam, but it sounds like you are coming to terms and moving in a positive direction with a plan. I echo Gary, Terry, and other comments above. Stay strong brother and prayers are being sent your way from here sir.

357ross
December 21, 2015, 18:51
It took incredible courage to post this Adam. I don't know you but your troubles in life do ring true and familiar. I'll keep you and your son in prayers. For what it's worth, in my corner of the world, I don't know anyone who is not dealing with serious life altering issues right now. Take care, and God speed.

2barearms
December 21, 2015, 19:11
Humility is one of those rare commodities that is generally regarded as
both a weakness and a strength. It does take strength to admit you are
in over your head and still keep your chin up. You sound as though you have
had a pretty rough go of it for some time and hopefully you find some peace.

2ba

Flypaper
December 21, 2015, 19:14
Adam..... Don't get me wrong... You are still " THE MAN" when it comes to a quality product. And it sounds like you have been running " In the red" with personal matters overwhelming you.... With rights you should, family comes first... ALWAYS. I would like to commend you on your efforts....I see to many deadbeat parents not caring about their kids.

Back to topic...

Adam... You put out a quality product every time. :bow:
I probably shouldn't had commented on your thread because I didn't have a dog in the fight.... but, I did because of my GB.
The response was a bit surprising and creative.... I thought I could only get my EX to come unglued.
Sorry I was the straw that broke the camels back.... no one needs the stress you have been going through..... or what I have been going through at home lately.

I work a job that constantly has deadlines..... daily, hourly.. If I say something will be done, I make sure it is..... that's my word, and that's what I gauge myself on.

If you did a project for someone and told them 6mo turnaround..... fair enough, + a month is no big deal... Get done early and look like a God.
Same project... tell them a month or so and ship it in 6mo... expectations changed... Same project, same timeframe, different outcome... not that warm fuzzy feeling.

You are a good guy Adam, with a lot of talent.... and a lot on his plate.
Please don't take any of this wrong.... and may it help with any of your future business transactions.

Take care. :beer:


Flippin gerbils... you crack me up man.. :rofl:

AZ Dave
December 21, 2015, 19:31
I'll keep you in my prayers Adam. 2015 has been a very difficult year for me as well but this is your thread. Sometimes we need to stop and reassess the situation and then make a course correction. I wish you well in your journey. Dave

slavicshooter
December 21, 2015, 21:46
Mrs.ss and I will pray for a soul benefiting outcome to your troubles. God will profit your soul during this time of sorrow. Let Him.~ss
“Recollect the fall of the strong, that thou mayest remain humble under thy virtues. And think of the heavy sins of those who fell and repented; and of the praise and honour they received afterwards, so that thou mayest acquire courage during repentance.”

+ St. Isaac the Syrian, “Six Treatises on the Behaviour of Excellence”

Jaxxas
December 21, 2015, 23:04
It takes a strong man to make a post like that.

Adam stay strong. You already have the courage.

Prayers that your family situation finds a center, and that all can move up from this low point.


+1

rbgonoles
December 21, 2015, 23:15
All the best Adam and hoping that a break helps. You built my first FAL and my soon to be first BGS. Your work is top notch. They will be cherished.

Texgunner
December 22, 2015, 00:31
Brave review Adam; keep your head up and remember, this too will pass.

rarecat
December 22, 2015, 09:59
I have nothing but positives for Adam, all my deals have been great. Hang tough my friend, things will get better

Pluribus
December 22, 2015, 18:34
In the mean time, all projects here presently will be finished. Absolutely no more work will be taken. I am done for the forseeable future. I will not leave with unfinished work still here.

Glad I saw this today, I was (did) go to the PO but, I'll hold sending the barrel and parts I talked with you on the phone about a week or so ago.

I can appreciate the stress. Been there too and, you need to concentrate on the family first. I completely understand and, you are all in my daily thoughts and meditations.

Goodwill always,

:salute:

adam762
December 22, 2015, 19:47
I have a few more neat projects to turn loose, including an L2, a short gas para, a blued Belgian StG, and a few blued Belgian rifles. I am incredibly proud of each piece.

Stubborn defense of an indefensible position is admirable but still a losing proposition. I am losing ground and in danger of being overrun. I need to pull back, regroup, and reform. My snappiness with folks here is representative of the rest of my life, and you can imagine how that goes over with juvenile court officials who show up after bedtime unannounced. I'm lucky to have avoided felonies myself at this point.

This isn't a sympathy thread. I don't need that crap. I know that I'm not the first guy to have a tough hand dealt. I'll play it and live to see the next hand. That's all great but the reality is I just can't go on as is.

The transition back to aviation is one that's happening sooner than I planned. Firearms have never been a passion. Jets have. I'd love to play with this stuff as a hobby but I really want to be elbows deep in a turbine again.

notfrommt
December 22, 2015, 20:09
I appreciate your approach to the issues you are facing. Honesty with yourself first is the best way. If there is any way I can help out let me know.

SteelGreyML
December 23, 2015, 17:51
Prayers that you see better days soon.

If you travel off overseas, I hope it is safe for you.

Your work has always been enjoyable to look at.

Best wishes for the season and beyond.

nyalaman
December 23, 2015, 18:19
Good luck and stay strong. instrospection usually has good outcomes eventually.

davesrb
December 24, 2015, 19:32
Hey Adam, sorry its been so long since we talked! As some one who just made a career change myself, I can't stress how much of a relief it will be. Just making the decision gave me a great deal of peace. I leave behind a body of work that I am proud of, as can you. A year from now, your customers will most likely have forgotten about the longer than promised wait times. They will have many years to enjoy the beautiful FAL's you built them.

Good luck!

L1A1Johnno
December 26, 2015, 02:59
Adam
Life has shown me that when one door closes another opens, as I am sure it will for you. Your a tough guy and will handle the tasks thrown at you.

Keep you head up mate. Prayers are with you.

Johnno

Sudden Death
December 26, 2015, 15:30
Geez Brother, I didn't know things were this bad.

Hang in there, I'll give you a call on Monday.

Bill

Bug Tussell
December 27, 2015, 13:49
We all trip and fall. Most times we miss the ravine but sometimes we don't.

Skilter
December 28, 2015, 02:02
I will add fwiw... My father gave me some advice once... Take no more than 50% of the blame at most. It always takes two to tango.

My best..

adam762
December 30, 2015, 16:45
UPDATE:

Thanks for the thoughts folks. It's stupid. Sometimes I'm pissed about it. Sometimes I'm depressed. Had the opportunity to sit in a tree stand for three hours and hunt with member Clyde the pointer yesterday and that was nice. Today was very productive to that was helpful too.

Monday was the hearing where it was supposed to all end, apparently. My parents showed up. My parents, the prosecution, both defense attorneys, and the childrens services rep had a little pow wow and then the attorneys went to further converse with the judge. No one spoke a word to me.

They had planned for my parents to take my boy home with them, right then and there. That was the grand plan they'd come up with. No one had talked to me about it since it was mentioned as a possibility last week. We walked in blind. I went into the courtroom not knowing that they planned on my boy not coming back with me, and funny, my folks being in on it the whole time, never said a word to me.

That didn't happen. I derailed it for a few more weeks by requesting a second opinion on the psych eval. The first one was rushed, and incomplete. I won a delaying action only, managing to secure the right to have what I think is a fair and comprehensive evaluation done by a treatment center of my choosing. He's still going away - either up the hill to my parents (as the attorneys wish) or off to a residential treatment center as I wish. We'll see. If he goes to residential, I am required to attend family sessions every two weeks, so even though I may be free, I am not free. I don't know about the outpatient stuff if he goes to live with my parents - my attitude is that if they take him, they can have the WHOLE ball of wax. I'm outta here. But I don't know.

Of course I could walk away and give him up anytime. Wash my hands and be done. But damn, after all these years of giving him my very best, of putting him first... quitting now would make it all worthless. So I gotta ride it out for a month and see what happens. I was going to be here finishing up stuff anyways.

Happy new year, folks. Hope next year is better for everybody.

oleblu72
December 31, 2015, 11:59
Its sad Adam that your having turmoil within your family and as you look forward and try to catch a glimpse of the light at the end of the ole proverbial tunnel sometimes it just seems like it just not gonna come something keeps turning the light off so you can't find it. But I guess then you have to stand on your faith and say a prayer and try to trick your mind into believing that you do see something at the end might not be very bright right now but it is there. I hope & pray that the new year will be a little nicer to you.

Mark

Cessnapilot89
January 14, 2016, 23:20
Adam, you are in my prayers. Hope 2016 is a better year.

-Cody

M829A3
January 15, 2016, 12:44
I wish you luck Adam. I never got that far, but my ex, spent a decade making my son, think the world revolved around him, when she had no more use for him, he was suddenly a problem. I warned him, repeatedly, tried to give him responsibilities, prepare him for the REAL world. He would have none of it. Now he knows. Tainted my relationship with him, possibly permanently. Dont give up, children are the future, and God knows we'll need capable leaders, sooner rather than later.

TOWS220
January 15, 2016, 20:48
Good luck Adam, I know times like this are trying but pushing through will lead you to brighter days.

You built me a beautiful short gas l1a1. I dreamed of that gun for months while deployed to afghanistan, then came back to the barrel waiting for me. I assembled it with good friends and it is a beautiful gun to say the least. I respect you and your work.

MajHenryWest
January 27, 2016, 19:15
Godspeed, Brother.

adam762
February 08, 2016, 09:15
Last Tuesday was the hearing. I fought to get another psych eval for the kid, as the first one was absolutely rushed and incomplete. I had the new eval done by THE expert in the area, and felt like he really took the time to listen to me as the parent as well as my kid. He did his evaluation a week and a half before the hearing and I had him submit it to the court so that all the interested parties could read it at their leisure.

We showed up for a 1 o'clock hearing, and NO ONE had bothered to read it. Not the prosecution, not the guardian ad litem, no one. It was an afterthought it seemed.

The judge issued custody to my parents, and sent my boy to live with them. That's where the offenses took place, and even the victims mother objected to that placement, which the prosecution admitted to. I objected on the grounds that no one had yet explained to me why my child was being removed from my home.

It's a mess. I got rolled. The attorneys involved on my kids behalf did NOT exist to serve his best interest, but rather to simply aid the court in the efficient processing of a case to a conclusion. I was an irritation to the court and earned the judges ire by asking questions and challenging things.

At the moment, it's over. For me. It's a train wreck, for sure, but I've been thrown clear of the wreckage, and I am free to walk away. I've pissed off the juvenile court system for sure, but the odds of me ever having to deal with them again are slim.

When I first came here to the files I was an airplane guy. One of my first posts was a pic I took sitting up on the horizontal stab of one of my Embrairs at work. 'The cheap seats.' Soon after, my kid turned 5 and started school. I left aviation to start THIS, and threw myself at being a family guy. I loved being dad, coach, ect. I was looking forward to the last two years, as there are some cool moments between 15 and 18.

Not for me.

So now I'm left with nothing, and wondering what's next. I'm working on that end but there's things here to do still. An H&R T48, an L2, a C1A1-8L, a wild custom short gas, among others. I ship 2 rifles a week usually but last week it was only one.

We'll see where things go. It's a mess. I'm ok as long as I'm busy but the quiet times are hard. Where'd my kids go? Damn.

rbgonoles
February 08, 2016, 12:20
Hang in there Adam

Pluribus
February 08, 2016, 14:21
You are in my thoughts and, meditations for the best.

pmacadelic
February 09, 2016, 23:52
Adam,
Keep your head high and stay positive. things will work, maybe not how you envinsioned or hoped for, but over time you'll see why things go the way they do sometimes. hang in there. May god bless you.

Eyeguy
February 10, 2016, 00:15
Stay positive brother. Prayers for you and your family.

goodorbit
February 10, 2016, 15:52
Hey Adam,
Stay strong and be well. You are an extremely capable man. You will get through this. Just might take a bit of time. Feel free to reach out if you need an ear to chew on.
Best,
Chris

adam762
February 14, 2016, 22:42
I appreciate the words guys. I'm normally a very private person, and I have a thing for personal responsibility and not wanting to hear any crying about anything, but this whole thing has been so horrible I would come undone if I didn't fine a way to cope. Discovering that I wasn't the only guy in the world who had been subject to some shitty times has helped. I've found I have a few GOOD friends, a great woman (and her daughter who makes me feel like I matter as a parent), and I've found that work is my best escape.

I don't understand the courts actions or why they won't listen to me at all. There is so much double standard involved. So little concern for the big picture. They won't say it outright but my suspicion is that they hold me responsible for his actions in some way. I think they figure that my 'sins' will come out in treatment when he talks to the counselors. He can tell them how I beat his ass for lies and stealing, how I beat his ass for failing classes at school, ect. Yeah they can come get me for that I guess. I dunno.... It's a wreck, but as I said, at the moment I feel like I've been thrown clear. I think I need to do my best to stay that way. Back off, STFU, let the situation be, and go chase jets somewhere while I get my shit together. Marry this girl who has put up with my ridiculous ass for three years now. Get out of this town, this house, and just go forward. The memories here are poison. It's just one day at a time.

Hawkish
February 21, 2016, 01:50
Adam! Hang in there brother! We've been wheeling and dealing here on the files for almost 15 years! I know you're a stand up guy! And a hell of a mechanic!! I know things will turn around for you! You'll be in our prayers! Let me know if you need anything tool wise! I still think I owe you for that barrel you gave me a few years back!!

Chris