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View Full Version : Need a kit, but the wife......


Sydwaiz
March 20, 2002, 02:14
....will probably kill me if I order one! I got my first receiver and am aching to finish it. I would like to get in on the Tapco presale if possible. The thing is, is that we are trying to purchase a new home right now and she is trying to direct all my money towards that. What should I do? Do I order one with my credit card and not tell her or do I wait and make her happy? :confused: What about my wants and needs? It's not like I'm asking for alot, just one kit.(yeah, right ;) ) Please help me do the right thing.

warfrog
March 20, 2002, 03:18
I'm single, thank the Good Lord, so I can't help you. My advice would be to buy what you want, but that doesn't work for some married folks. Aaah, the single life: want a gun, buy a gun. Sorry, didn't mean to rub it in. :D

[ March 20, 2002: Message edited by: warfrog ]

Templator
March 20, 2002, 03:27
,... read what you wrote,.. "trying to direct all of 'my' money"

So what is it? Is it your money or is it hers?

Buy the kit,... hell,... buy 6 of em. When she starts pissin and moanin about it,... pack a couple of em over to a friends house and work on em. If she's still cryin the blues when ya get home,.. go back and work on em some more. 'Bout the time you get three rifles finished,.. she'll either have gotten the message or she'll be gone. Either way,.. you win.

woodie
March 20, 2002, 03:39
Send her outta the house to a scrapbook party. She'll forget all about your guns, but she'll want some $$ for books, stickers, etc,etc. We have it figuered out one crop to one gunshow-range trip. But if she knew the $ for $, She'd kill me. :D :D

Enquiring Minds
March 20, 2002, 03:50
As some wise wag in a similar thread said, put it on the card, and when the bill comes, tell her TAPCO stands for The Auto Parts COmpany! :D :D

... make sure to perform some useless monkeying around under the hood after the BBT drops off your "parts".

Queenie
March 20, 2002, 09:08
If you have to lie about it, then it its time for a talk with your wife. I never hide stuff from mine. If I feel like I have to hide a purchase, then maybe I can't really afford it in the first place...then again my wife is a very reasonable person when it comes to my "toys". She likes for me to be happy. ;)

Randall
March 20, 2002, 10:41
Gotta go with Queenie on this one. Don't hide it. Just buy one if you can afford it. If you can't afford it, you should already know that you shouldn't buy it.

As far as what to tell your wife, heck I don't know. I've never had that problem. My wife just rolls her eyes and goes shopping for something she wants. Good luck.

SF
March 20, 2002, 10:44
Just a thought...Have a good friend buy it and pay him back over time or trade him something he may like you have for his buying power ;)

Ricketts
March 20, 2002, 11:22
If you can't afford a hundred bucks, this addiction is gonna kill you.

avanarts
March 20, 2002, 11:26
Hey, I can't believe no one has come up with the obvious answer yet. Buy one for HER. Then offer to put it together for her. Guns are good for birthday, Christmas, and any other holiday or gift giving occasion.

SoManyGun'sSoLittleTime
March 20, 2002, 14:19
I'm single, thank the Good Lord, so I can't help you. My advice would be to buy what you want, but that doesn't work for some married folks. Aaah, the single life: want a gun, buy a gun. Sorry, didn't mean to rub it in.


AMEN i still get the why do you need another gun when i tell my mom about it (and the standard answer is "Cause I want it!) and when i tell my dad he says cool lets go shoot! hmmm must be a guy thing? :D oWell could be worse :)

CATM Larry
March 20, 2002, 16:50
Just explain things to her the way I did for my wife: What in tarnation is the point of owning a house if you don't have a FAL G1 to protect it with ? :D

Larry

Hermit River
March 20, 2002, 16:56
"we are trying to purchase a new home right now and she is trying to direct all my money towards that."

Syd.. Simple, you can't go to extremes and live a happy fulfilling life. If you put every single cent towards the home, in some way there will be "disharmony".

Buddha taught "anything, but nothing to excess" Sure you both want the house but you got to have some fun too. So with Buddhas blessings you better just go buy it and tell her it was the right thing to do for the relationship, for harmony, because you really care about her. Of course you have to get her something of equal or slightly greater value. Case of ORMD for instance. Hermit

BlueDog
March 20, 2002, 16:57
Originally posted by CATM Larry:
<STRONG>Just explain things to her the way I did for my wife: What in tarnation is the point of owning a house if you don't have a FAL G1 to protect it with ? :D

Larry</STRONG>

I knew I wasn't the only one using this excuse...er...reason as justification. ;)

TerryB
March 20, 2002, 16:58
Sydwaiz:

Queenie, Randall and Ricketts are all right. It's hard to and you should not keep (most) things from the wife. Also, if a hundred dollars causes a problem, you've come to the wrong website. Sell the receiver, delete this website from your "Favorites" and get out now (you'll spend a lot more than a hundred dollars real quick). SF makes a good point of using a friend to help out for the time being.

Generally, I tell the wife everything. But, a deal may come up that she just doesn't need to know about. That's where my Credit Union comes to the rescue. I've bought lawnmowers, a printer, a car stereo, etc. (at least that what was on the application). It works for those big ticket items I don't want to explain anything about.

There is another solution to your short term money supply. You can sell anything on eBay. I've sold hundreds of dollars worth of stuff since November. All you need is a digital camera or scanner. And all I am doing is getting stuff out of my way. It's a good way to make some cash. And you said you were buying a new home. I'm certain there are items you want to get rid of before you move again. It's easy once you get started.

Hope this helps. All I know is it works for me.

Russ
March 20, 2002, 17:28
First --put the order in

Then: Tell her the truth --you have an addiction, a problem...you acknowledge it and are seeking help for it. In fact, you now have daily contact with an internet support group called FAL-Files:

(F-reedom from A-ssaultweapon L-ust)

...and you're pretty sure you're going to beat this thing, can she just hold on a little longer, you'll quit tomorrow, etc.
Russ

DrDremel
March 20, 2002, 17:30
Just do what I did when I bought a subgun. I bought it even though she was pissed. You see, she got over it. Three years later, I still have the gun. It is a small price to pay.

devilmonkey
March 20, 2002, 17:34
I guess it's easy for me as my wife is into shooting too. Best suggestion is to take your time and get her hooked on shooting slowly, then she won't complain so much. When I got my kit the wife wanted to know when it would be done and when she could shoot it... Looks like she'll be wanting herr own soon, heh :) We are looking at houses too but only ones that have a good workshop for the reloading setup. Funny, since I got her into motorcycles she doesn't complain about all the cash I dump into old bikes so much anymore.

Sydwaiz
March 20, 2002, 22:24
Thanks for all your support and understanding. Alot of your replys are really funny. I do tell my wife everything, sometimes before, sometimes after. I will admit though, we do need a house. Our little apt is just too damn small anymore for all my toys! She is understanding, she has a couple of guns too and is into old Chevys like I am (another money pit). Once the home buying is out of the way, its back to toys!

skfullgun
March 20, 2002, 22:47
I have to agree with what most of the others have said about honesty being the best policy. I'm on my second marriage. During the first, I had to hide many of my purchases. No, I'm not a wimp, but it just wasn't worth the bitchin' I was gonna have to listen to. So I bought it and hid it!!! That marriage went the way of the cuckoo bird, and I lost most of my collection due to the setback.

Now, I have a good relationship in which we have an understanding. We both spend whatever we want, within reason. Big purchases (from either of us) are open to compromise and deliberation. Usually, if it's a big purchase and I need to ask her opinion, I already know that it's probably a frivolous purchase. Still, she has never told me "no", and I would never tell her "no" for any of her purchases that I would deem uneccessary. Marriage takes work - at least if you want it to last and not be a perpetual nighmare!

My opinion...buy the kit. Hell, it's a measly $100. In exchange, hold off on the rest of the parts and supplies for the build until after you get the house. Then you can build your very first FAL in your very own garage!!! :D

BlackHawk1
March 20, 2002, 23:44
My wife still asks, "Why do you need it?" and I reply "Because (fill in your favorite excuse/reason)". Be honest about it. She buys Swarovski crystal figurines, I buy firearms, we both have our hobbies. The cardinal rule is not to question her hobby purchases and comment on how pretty they are.

I will hopefully be ordering a DSA STG 58A Type 02 as soon as my refund from SOG comes back from a cancelled FrankenFAL order...they played games, I didn't :D

Jack19
March 21, 2002, 10:20
I had a kit show up the other day. The first words out of my wife's mouth was "Was it free?" I said "No, but the undying love of my wife is." She never said another word. lol

Brindfan
March 21, 2002, 10:36
How many pairs of shoes does your wife have???

I knew being single was a good thing. It is proven to me almost every day. :D

ByronF
March 21, 2002, 11:47
Do you have an arrangement where finances are openly discussed and responsibilities shared? If so, put on the gloves if you must but don't lie about it. Go without, fight it out, or plea your case. You'll damage your mutual trust if you sneak one in.

Byron

Blood of Tyrants
March 21, 2002, 12:51
Put away a small amount of money each week for your toys, say $20. Tell the wife that this is your allowance to yourself. As compensation take her out on a date every couple of weeks. Pay attention to her like you did before you were married. She won't mind either your hobby or the extra attention a bit.

kfranz
March 21, 2002, 13:06
For now, use your work money to buy the house. Pay the sob off ASAP. If you've ever multiplied the monthly payment by the number of payments, then subtracted the purchase price, you'll see how many kits interest will cost you. Donate plasma/sell on ebay/do side work/fill in the blank to fund the hobby.

[ March 21, 2002: Message edited by: kfranz ]

walruskid1
March 21, 2002, 19:07
don't lie, it will bite you in the ass later. i know from experience. just tell her your getting the kit to SAVE money on the finished product then buy her something of similiar price. dave :)

m1shooter
March 21, 2002, 19:31
I agree with the templator
go for the rifle
Lose the woman.....lol :D

Shrike
March 21, 2002, 19:56
Originally posted by Sydwaiz:
<STRONG>....will probably kill me if I order one! I got my first receiver and am aching to finish it. I would like to get in on the Tapco presale if possible. The thing is, is that we are trying to purchase a new home right now and she is trying to direct all my money towards that. What should I do? Do I order one with my credit card and not tell her or do I wait and make her happy? :confused: What about my wants and needs? It's not like I'm asking for alot, just one kit.(yeah, right ;) ) Please help me do the right thing.</STRONG>

It seems we are in exactly the opposite shoes. I need a wife, but I have to many kits and guns laying around my house that im afraid to bring a chick over, she might think im some kind of "Gun Nut" or something

:D :D :D :D :D

Sumoj275
March 21, 2002, 21:09
There is a lot of good advice up above. I do it and tell my wife later. Then again she knew I had this problem of buying what I wanted before we got married. I have changed though, now I tell her about it, try toi get her involved and don't buy stuff when we don't have the money to do it. If that doesn't work remind her that the next time that you go out to Wally World or anywhere else and she buys something for herself--you are keeping tabs and get the kit as soon as she spends the same amount.

JMO.

F4GIB
March 21, 2002, 22:46
If you presently use the "one pot" method of family finances, here's a long-term solution to try.

Get 3 checking accounts - her's, mine amd our's. Each month you BOTH get "paid" a set amount into your personnel account. You can do whatever you want with those dollars. Then the rest (from each of you if both work) goes into our's and is spent on the family bills. Over the years, you'll be able to put more in the individual accounts as the house gets paid off, etc. And you never have to account for that money. Neither will she.

If you can't afford a new toy from your account, you don't get it. If the family account develops a surplus, you can divide it or whatever you decide. This doesn't eliminate financial discussions but it sure limits their scope and duration.

For example, last Christmas we went to Europe. The family account paid for 2 weeks and my wife, who wanted us to stay longer, paid for 1. I bought another pre-ban FAL. We both got what WE wanted. :D

Sydwaiz
March 21, 2002, 23:15
F4GIB, we do have seperate accounts as well as a joint one. She just has her head on straighter than I do and is more disciplined when it comes to spending. Which makes me lucky because she is not materialistic or high maintenance. Me, I like my toys and always have. Well, I just put in an offer today for a home. If everything goes well I will be back to my toys very soon! :D

Celtic warrior
March 22, 2002, 00:05
I'm a lucky "attached" guy, meaning if I really wanted it. she'd have zero problem saying go ahead. A hundred bucks+ shipping is rather on the inexpensive side considering what I would REALLY want to buy.

Rivrrat
March 22, 2002, 00:16
Alright bud, here's my .02 rathole the receiver and get the house before intrest rates start going up. You'll be kicking yourself if you buy a bunch of gun parts now and you end up paying a hundred bucks more a month in increased intrest later.

But keep reminding your wife of the great sacrifice you're making to get the house.

And when you sell it down the road you ought to have enough equity to slip a really nice rifle in before the check is cut on the next house.

sixplusone
March 22, 2002, 12:07
Sell the old cars(money pit); put most of it towards the house. You are lucky to have a smart wife; the house will save you $ in the long run. And the home of your own has merits in peace of mind for money well spent.
AND you can take $100 out to buy the kit!
AND your wife will remember your sacrifice(the money pit/sold) for your DSA recv'r. and next kit!

Sydwaiz
March 22, 2002, 13:57
Well, escrow should start Monday! I could sell the old cars but one is my first car, a 55 Chevy, I got it 13yrs ago. The other is my wife's 65 Nova SS that she refuses to sell. We haven't put money into those for quite a few years now and I keep them at my shop. Out of sight, out of mind. Thank you to all that have replied. This is the best support group ever. Now who wants to help me move? :D

Kharn
March 22, 2002, 18:04
TAPCO = The Auto Parts COmpany. Didnt you tell your wife that a $250 part on the car broke, and you ordered it off the internet? Of course, you shopped around and got it for $100.

Kharn

FredB
March 22, 2002, 18:20
This has been fun reading. You know, we could be nice and each send a few bucks to TAPCO on Sydwaiz' behalf, and get him a kit as a (hopefully) housewarming present.